I am so fing pissed right now

W

wrightme43

My sister just brought Trinity home. Its 1004pm. Her bed time is 830, and she has to take shower because they do not bathe her all weekend.

She says that Trinity was with Samantha who is my sisters boyfriends mom at a freaking hotel. I am calling social services in the morning. Actually I think I am going to call them and leave a message as soon as I get to bed after her shower and blowdry her hair. Nobody needs to have a kid at a hotel room in town here. There is absolutely no legitimate reason to have take her to a hotel room when she is supposed to be with her mom. NONE! Her right front tooth is knocked loose, she says Travis did that, he is Samanthas' son. He is 5. It just grew in a few months ago. I fing hate my family.

There is absolutely no legitament reason for someone to rent a hotel room for saturday night and sunday night, but to come home sunday night at 10pm. Its 1031pm. Trin is still up. They have not fed her anything but yogurt and rootbeer all day. I know that Samantha used to be a professional prostitute. Her boyfriend is a freaking scumball. As soon as I get Trin to bed I will be calling social services and hell maybe the police. Trin said they were in Nashville. I think that can be construed as kidnapping. I have full custody. Visitation according to court order is at my sole discretion. I have said multiple times I dont want her going anywhere with Samantha.
 
Thanks man. Well the police dept cant do anything. As I have no proof who had her or where she was.
Social services doesnt even have a way to leave a message.

I can just say no visitation at all though. Then Trin gets screwed, but Trin is getting screwed this way too.
 
I am all for it. KY has a great way of getting out of that though. Whoever requests supervised vistation has to pay for a third party to supervise the visit.

Its easier to just stop it, or to make visitation in my home. Only problem with that is I tried it for a year and she showed up maybe three times for less than 2 hours the whole time.

Thanks Lytehouse
 
It's heartbreaking that she has to go on these visits! Also not good for Trin to exposed to that kind of behavior...but at least she has you to teach her right & wrong. Hang in there Steve, parenting is the toughest job in the world!
 
That's rough man. What is absolutely paramount is the safety and security of your girl. If that means no more outside the house visits, then so be it... My best advice is take a little time to cool your jets and compose yourself. Formulate what you'll say to whomever you do decide to take this up with (don't know how it works in KY), and think everything out. I'm a soc. student, so for whatever it's worth I've seen cases of "supposed" abuse to larger degrees go unchecked because the accuser was beligerant. I know it's tough, but line up all your pieces before you make a deciding move. Good luck, nothing is more important than family, so these kinds of situations really hit home for me...
 
Sorry to hear dude, youve had a rough time, without this on top of, as has been said think it through, not many got descisions are made at a inatant when mad as hell. Talk to her and get a real picture of what happened, then act.
 
wrightme43 said:
I am all for it. KY has a great way of getting out of that though. Whoever requests supervised vistation has to pay for a third party to supervise the visit.

Its easier to just stop it, or to make visitation in my home. Only problem with that is I tried it for a year and she showed up maybe three times for less than 2 hours the whole time.

Thanks Lytehouse
Click to expand...

This is the solution to your problem. You may think Trinity needs to see her mother but what kind of a mother is she really?

Have the visits at home where she won`t come and your problem is solved.

This is a social services matter and not a police matter.

I used to be a police officer and then after my bike accident I fostered kids who nobody else would take so I have had a lot of experience with social services. Don`t expect instant actio o the world from them because you will get neither. But report this to them so at least it is on record. But be calm or you may do more harm than good.

Steve
 
wrightme43 said:
My sister just brought Trinity home. Its 1004pm. Her bed time is 830, and she has to take shower because they do not bathe her all weekend.

She says that Trinity was with Samantha who is my sisters boyfriends mom at a freaking hotel. I am calling social services in the morning. Actually I think I am going to call them and leave a message as soon as I get to bed after her shower and blowdry her hair. Nobody needs to have a kid at a hotel room in town here. There is absolutely no legitimate reason to have take her to a hotel room when she is supposed to be with her mom. NONE! Her right front tooth is knocked loose, she says Travis did that, he is Samanthas' son. He is 5. It just grew in a few months ago. I fing hate my family.

There is absolutely no legitament reason for someone to rent a hotel room for saturday night and sunday night, but to come home sunday night at 10pm. Its 1031pm. Trin is still up. They have not fed her anything but yogurt and rootbeer all day. I know that Samantha used to be a professional prostitute. Her boyfriend is a freaking scumball. As soon as I get Trin to bed I will be calling social services and hell maybe the police. Trin said they were in Nashville. I think that can be construed as kidnapping. I have full custody. Visitation according to court order is at my sole discretion. I have said multiple times I dont want her going anywhere with Samantha.
Click to expand...
You (rightly) have a lot of steam up Steve, How is Trinity?
I think you should take advice and get the facts squared.

Nelly
 
sounds like you should just stop the visitation, or revert back to in your home visitation, I know you say that she only sticks around for a couple of hours for the in home visits, but by the sounds of it that is all she stick around this time for. and then Trin was in much worse company.
 
no!! no visits. motels mean--drugs--prostitution and God knows what else. no visits. it will be best for trin in the long run. maybe later--but now--no. just my 2cents steve--good luck and keep us informed--
 
I agree with everyone else. Sure Trinity needs to see her mother, but at what expense? Trinity might not understand now, but you know what is best for her. Take out the risk factor. You both will be much safer and happier without the added stress. If she wants to see her mom, make the visitation at your house or a common place that you can keep an eye on her. Man I hate that you and Trinity are in this situation, and I hope you get everything worked out.
 
Stop! No more! If she wants to see Trin, have her come to you, alone and do this supervised.

I'd have Trin talk to a social worker or a police woman regarding what happened there and what she was subject to and what she saw during her visit. I truly hope it isn't the case, but she may have gone through or witnessed more than you can imagine. The sooner the better too as it is still fresh in her mind.

End the visits for good Steve.
 
Do not let her go back. Really, if you let her go back, and something happens to her...
that is a road you don't want to travel.
like Deputy Fife says,"Nip it in the bud."
I can't even imagine the worry...
 
wrightme43 said:
Thanks man. Well the police dept cant do anything. As I have no proof who had her or where she was.
Social services doesnt even have a way to leave a message.
Click to expand...

I don't know the details of this story, but I would seriously consider hiring a local private investigator to have her/him tracked if this helps at all. I know also there are small, stealth GPS tracking devices you could attach to the car to find out the true location.

Google search is your friend for this.

Just my two cents worth.
 
Hey Steve,
Lots of good advice here -- especially a ten count before speaking with anyone in an "official" position. I would guess that your post here is about the same as a ten count. :thumbup:

I'd revert to the home visitation. Once Trin sees how little mom cares -- not showing up or showing up and only staying a short time -- she'll start to see her in a different light. And she'll come to appreciate you all the more.

And, as has been mentioned, you might try talking to her about what was going on in the hotel room. And if she's fidgety, you might then see about getting her to talk to a professional -- she may have been exposed to things she should not have been. And that, I'm sure you would agree, would be a bad thing.

Your feelings for her are quite obviously very strong, and your commitment to the work of being a good guardian is really commendable.

The universe is a funny, messed up place: we don't get choose the family into which we're born. But in the face of such madness, that little girl is fortunate to have someone who's caring enough to try and build something better for her.
 
wrightme43 said:
I have full custody. Visitation according to court order is at my sole discretion.
Click to expand...

I have the same deal with my 5yr old girl...and hasn't seen her mother in going on 3 years. She tries to contact me and run the same old BS games to try and see her...Then goes away for months before trying it again...Just take your child and keep her as far away from the nutjobs and scumbags as you can...the worst thing I have to deal with is her older half sister's father does let the older one see thier mom, when she does decide to come around(although she is old enough to realize that her mom is not a regular but you can see whats its already done to her, at 9yrs old). He is a weak fool and a ****ty father in my eyes. So when my little girl asks where her mom is or why her sister talks about her...the only thing I can say is "she is not in the right mind to care for you and doesn't bother to change that". Hopefully growing up hearing this and seeing that she only comes around when she feels like it, will help her understand.

You have a tuff job, BE the better parent and protect your child. And try to talk to her as an adult, explain why things have to change.

Good Luck fellow singe dad.

PS the mother has since had another child so the tally is; first 2 dads have custody and she just keeps spittin them out(this one seems to be good for her welfare).
 
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