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dean2287

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After 16 years and 2 great kids, looks like my marriage is headed for a divorce. My wife has been seeing someone else and also confessed that she doesn't love me anymore. Not much else to say there...

While this isn't exactly shocking to me, it's both very upsetting and kinda exciting at the same time. I'm 44, so not necessarily young but not old either. A divorce would set me back financially in a big way, but I have time to recover. My kids are 8 and 10 so they're still quite young and have a ways to go. All I'm really concerned about is their well-being.

It's a really tough time. Buy me a virtual drink.... :beer:
 

agf

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Mate some of us have been where you are now and to say the wind is knocked outta your sails is an understatement.
I lived on a few beers a day for a week, starting at about 9 every morning til i figured where my head was at
the only difference is I have one kid and it was 15 years
sounds like you are pretty pragmatic
keep talking to us, to your family, friends and dont be afraid to take on a counsellor, best thing I ever did.
best of luck for you
 

oldfast007

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Ouch...so sorry for you man. I have been separated for a while now hoping for a miracle myself. No cheating but the pain is the same. Stay strong for those kids! I will keep you in my prayers.

Sent from my DROID X2 using Tapatalk 2
 

chuckfz6ryder

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Sorry to hear that, seems to be going around alot lately. Just be a good father and get out there and ride alot till it gets cold. Hang in there, things will get better eventually.
 

greg

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make sure you keep records of her infidelity, also keep an eye on any shared bank accounts. i think it's classed as abandonment if you empty it first though

best bet is to speak to a good lawyer

if you do it amicably then it will be better for your kids. My parents remained friends after their divorce which probably helped.
 

foxbass

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Jeez
No easy path there my friend.
Been there, got a 20yr old boy.
The trick is to stay real good freinds with your kids and don't dis the missus in front of them (you sound like the kind of guy who already knows that) regardless of what they may relay back to you 'bout what she says.
If she's a good soul she'll know that you both still have a duty to the kids.

Wish you luck bro
 

chunkygoat

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Sorry to hear that brother, my parents split when I was only 10 - so from a child's perspective I can tell you something that always bothered me.

You say your worried for your children's well being -- from my experience - I can tell you i would have been a lot better off had my parents stayed in touch and been cool with each other. Instead, it was hostile between them and made it difficult for me.

Now I don't know your situation, but staying on good terms with your wife will go a long way in teaching your kids a valuable lesson.

My friend's parents divorced around the same time - his mother cheated on his dad, yet they still talk and still have a good relationship. I idolize that and wish my parents back in the day would have had that mentality.

Just saying, I know times are tough - but being keeping the relationship peaceful and even friendly would have a profound impact on your kids.

Sorry to hear that though - that's the best consoling words I can offer. It'll all work out for you in the long run.

-Matt
 

7UPyours

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Congrats man, make sure you don't let it hit you to hard and take care of your kids, also been there but no kids. Never have thought to myself that life was over as I have seen few people going to a dark place after a breakup, I got up next morning put my pants on 1 leg at a time and life went on, I am very much much happier now beer
 
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Kazza

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Very sad.
No matter what has happened the most important thing - your kids.
Don't argue/fight/diss her in front of them - no matter what she has done. The kids will suffer most.

Good luck and we're thinking of you
 

Nelly

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After 16 years and 2 great kids, looks like my marriage is headed for a divorce. My wife has been seeing someone else and also confessed that she doesn't love me anymore. Not much else to say there...

While this isn't exactly shocking to me, it's both very upsetting and kinda exciting at the same time. I'm 44, so not necessarily young but not old either. A divorce would set me back financially in a big way, but I have time to recover. My kids are 8 and 10 so they're still quite young and have a ways to go. All I'm really concerned about is their well-being.

It's a really tough time. Buy me a virtual drink.... :beer:
I have just had a virtual beer session in your honour. I am the same age group as you with young children. I can't imagine the distress it's caused you.
If you site the other party does that not lesson the financial burden?
I wish you health, happiness and endeavor.
Good luck,
Neil
 

2006_FZ6

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:beer: Here's your virtual beer and I'll tip a real one for you when I get home. Sorry to hear about your pending split up. Hang in there and let us know how you are doing. I'm sending some positive vibes your way.

We're here for you if you just need to talk/vent, whatever!
 

dean2287

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Well just to be clear, I certainly don't see it as doom and gloom. Truely, my kids deserve a better home life and upbringing than what they've been seeing in the last couple years. My wife doesn't give them the attention they need, and is very grumpy with them. I'm the one they run to, the one who entertains them, takes them camping, swimming, hiking, biking and so on. I even cook for them and clean up after them. About all my wife ever does is the laundry (because she doesn't trust me to do it). She sits texting with God-knows-who on her stupid phone and wishing she was somewhere else I guess.

Enough of that BS. Honestly I'm relieved. Our marriage has totally sucked for the last 4-5 years.

We are on very good terms however so there's no concern about her taking me for a ride on the divorce. We have a very mutual understanding of how to go about it and how to co-operate afterwards.

So, any late 30's super hot motorcycle riding nymphomaniac independantly wealthy females out there need a man?? :BLAA:
 
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