WARNING: Foul Language
From one of my nieces, who I thought was sweet & innocent
View attachment 49945
From one of my nieces, who I thought was sweet & innocent
View attachment 49945
~~Daily Feed, post what made you laugh today ~~
- Thread starter FinalImpact
- Start date
[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hylwE_b8PEA]Klondike Celebrity Challenge: What did Alfonso Ribeiro do for a Klondike bar? - YouTube[/ame]
- Joined
- Feb 24, 2011
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- Melbourne Australia
If you've travelled on the Underground in London you'll recognise the sign
lawlberg
Booth Babe
[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XbqiiY_Pam8]Westboro Mingle - YouTube[/ame]
Dresnewtoy
Junior Member
Not All Seniors Are Senile...
A balding, white haired man from Naples, Florida ,walked into a jewelry store this past Friday eveningwith a beautiful much younger gal at his side.
He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend.The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring.
The man said, 'No, I'd like to see something more special.'
At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and brought another ring over. 'Here's a stunning ring at only $40,000’the jeweler said. The lady's eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement. The old man seeing this said, 'We'll take it.'
The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the man stated,'By check. I know you need to make sure my check is good, so I'll write it now and you can call the bank Monday to verify the funds and I'll pick the ring up Monday afternoon.'
On Monday morning, the jeweler angrily phoned the old man and said 'Sir... There's no money in that account.''I know,' said the old man... 'But let me tell you about my weekend.’
Not All Seniors Are Senile...
A balding, white haired man from Naples, Florida ,walked into a jewelry store this past Friday eveningwith a beautiful much younger gal at his side.
He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend.The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring.
The man said, 'No, I'd like to see something more special.'
At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and brought another ring over. 'Here's a stunning ring at only $40,000’the jeweler said. The lady's eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement. The old man seeing this said, 'We'll take it.'
The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the man stated,'By check. I know you need to make sure my check is good, so I'll write it now and you can call the bank Monday to verify the funds and I'll pick the ring up Monday afternoon.'
On Monday morning, the jeweler angrily phoned the old man and said 'Sir... There's no money in that account.''I know,' said the old man... 'But let me tell you about my weekend.’
Not All Seniors Are Senile...
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Next Darwin recipient perhaps??? :spank::spank:
[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m7YoU60Wvow]Rambo Motorcyclist Epic Fail At Bike Rally in Italy - YouTube[/ame]
[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m7YoU60Wvow]Rambo Motorcyclist Epic Fail At Bike Rally in Italy - YouTube[/ame]
acniss
Junior Member
cmantis
Junior Member
True Story from this afternoon:
The last two days had "Chance of rain/thunderstorms 60%", but I rode the bike into work both days. We've had some gully-washers off and on (not as bad as Denver/Boulder/Pueblo) but I'd missed them during the commute and lunch both days.
Less than a mile from home tonight I was riding along Riverdale Road with the visor up, pleasant cool afternoon, and a very light sprinkle started coming down. All of the sudden my face just got soaked and I quickly flipped the visor down.
As I was wondering "WTH did that come from?!?" I noticed the car in front of me activated her windshield washer a second time. With it's mis-aimed nozzle. Spraying fluid clean over the car. And right onto me. Again.
Must've been in a great mood, because I laughed, hard! (I didn't lose my temper and scream and zoom around her and knock her rear-view-mirror to the ground, "Yah Bastage you sprayed me in the face!!! :Flip
The last two days had "Chance of rain/thunderstorms 60%", but I rode the bike into work both days. We've had some gully-washers off and on (not as bad as Denver/Boulder/Pueblo) but I'd missed them during the commute and lunch both days.
Less than a mile from home tonight I was riding along Riverdale Road with the visor up, pleasant cool afternoon, and a very light sprinkle started coming down. All of the sudden my face just got soaked and I quickly flipped the visor down.
As I was wondering "WTH did that come from?!?" I noticed the car in front of me activated her windshield washer a second time. With it's mis-aimed nozzle. Spraying fluid clean over the car. And right onto me. Again.
Must've been in a great mood, because I laughed, hard! (I didn't lose my temper and scream and zoom around her and knock her rear-view-mirror to the ground, "Yah Bastage you sprayed me in the face!!! :Flip
** NSFW **
Not all that funny, maybe not the best place , but damm - guy has some big ones....
[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p7Nu_vVvqyo]Naked Motorcycle Stunt Raises Road Rash - YouTube[/ame]
Not all that funny, maybe not the best place , but damm - guy has some big ones....
[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p7Nu_vVvqyo]Naked Motorcycle Stunt Raises Road Rash - YouTube[/ame]
Love this...
Love this...
Jeez.. how square is that rear tire? Almost looks like it's from a car. Way to unnecessarily drag parts!
It is a car tire; a lot of the guys on the bigger bikes use an auto tire in the rear to get more miles. Dumber than dirt, but hey...
Hope this isn't a repost
A farmer stopped by the local mechanics shop to have his truck fixed. They couldn't do it while he waited, so he said he didn't live far and would just walk home. On the way home he stopped at the hardware Store and bought a bucket and a gallon of paint. He then stopped by the feed store and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. However, struggling outside the store he now had a problem - how to carry his entire purchases home. While he was scratching his head he was approached by a little old lady who told him she was lost.
She asked, 'Can you tell me how to get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane?'
The farmer said, 'Well, as a matter of fact, my farm is very close to that house I would walk you there but I can't carry this lot.'
The old lady suggested, 'Why don't you put the can of paint in the bucket. Carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand?'
'Why thank you very much,' he said and proceeded to walk the old girl home.
On the way he says 'Let's take my short cut and go down this alley. We'll be there in no time.'
The little old lady looked him over cautiously then said, 'I am a lonely widow without a husband to defend me. How do I know that when we get in the alley you won't hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and have your way with me?'
The farmer said, 'Holy smokes lady! I'm carrying a bucket, a gallon of paint, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?'
The old lady replied, 'Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the paint on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens.
A farmer stopped by the local mechanics shop to have his truck fixed. They couldn't do it while he waited, so he said he didn't live far and would just walk home. On the way home he stopped at the hardware Store and bought a bucket and a gallon of paint. He then stopped by the feed store and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. However, struggling outside the store he now had a problem - how to carry his entire purchases home. While he was scratching his head he was approached by a little old lady who told him she was lost.
She asked, 'Can you tell me how to get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane?'
The farmer said, 'Well, as a matter of fact, my farm is very close to that house I would walk you there but I can't carry this lot.'
The old lady suggested, 'Why don't you put the can of paint in the bucket. Carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand?'
'Why thank you very much,' he said and proceeded to walk the old girl home.
On the way he says 'Let's take my short cut and go down this alley. We'll be there in no time.'
The little old lady looked him over cautiously then said, 'I am a lonely widow without a husband to defend me. How do I know that when we get in the alley you won't hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and have your way with me?'
The farmer said, 'Holy smokes lady! I'm carrying a bucket, a gallon of paint, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?'
The old lady replied, 'Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the paint on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens.