- Joined
- Nov 13, 2007
- Messages
- 4,564
- Reaction score
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- Points
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- Location
- ColoradoSprings,CO
that's pretty funny chaskell....hope you enjoy this:
Element: Men
Symbol: MCP
Discoverer: Eve
Atomic Mass: Accepted at 60.6kg but known to vary from 50-200kg
Occurrences: Found in all areas but especially prevalent within 6 feet of televisual equipment
Physical Properties:
•Surface usually covered in copious amounts of hair, especially in ear and nasal cavities
•Generally larger than Wo except for brain capacity
•Reproductive appendages inversely proportionate to engine size of specimen’s car
•Characteristics range from malleable to hard as steel
•Right hand specially designed to support pint pot, beer can, remote control and steering wheel (Note: left hand is physically incapable of touching steering wheel during driving process)
Chemical Properties:
•Energy dissipates immediately when exposed to household chores
•Activity and usefulness greatly reduced by saturation in alcohol. Reproductive ability is especially affected
•Bonding with other specimens triggered in the presence of mechanical devices and by insubstantial materials such as televised rugby
•Specimen hardens in presence of superior Wo specimens
•Appears hard and cool when surrounded by other MCP specimens but reverts to natural warm, soft state in isolation
•Genetically programmed to bond with Wo specimen. Once bonded, testosterone causes isolation to have magnetic effect. Specimen often attempts to break bond again or at least lets other MCP specimens know that he could if he wanted to.
•Eyes vitrify and brain viscosity increases when exposed to Wo specimen’s attempts to eradicate less desirable MCP characteristics.
Common Uses:
•Labour saving devices for taking out the rubbish, mowing the lawn etc
•Desirable heating properties on cold winter nights
•Useful sacrifice in the event of external attack on Wo
Tests:
•Formation of average specimen only completed after contact with Wo.
•Volatile – turns red and explodes when subject to pressure and unable to progress on predetermined path.
•Uncontrolled gravitation towards heat, e.g. BBQs, 98% of the duvet etc.
•Easily absorbed by disproportionately large female mammary glands.
Hazards:
•Greater size in comparison to Wo makes specimen liable to claim unduly high proportion of physical environment, e.g. bed, sofa etc.
•Reproduces uncontrollably by attempting to fuse with Wo at any given opportunity
Element: Men
Symbol: MCP
Discoverer: Eve
Atomic Mass: Accepted at 60.6kg but known to vary from 50-200kg
Occurrences: Found in all areas but especially prevalent within 6 feet of televisual equipment
Physical Properties:
•Surface usually covered in copious amounts of hair, especially in ear and nasal cavities
•Generally larger than Wo except for brain capacity
•Reproductive appendages inversely proportionate to engine size of specimen’s car
•Characteristics range from malleable to hard as steel
•Right hand specially designed to support pint pot, beer can, remote control and steering wheel (Note: left hand is physically incapable of touching steering wheel during driving process)
Chemical Properties:
•Energy dissipates immediately when exposed to household chores
•Activity and usefulness greatly reduced by saturation in alcohol. Reproductive ability is especially affected
•Bonding with other specimens triggered in the presence of mechanical devices and by insubstantial materials such as televised rugby
•Specimen hardens in presence of superior Wo specimens
•Appears hard and cool when surrounded by other MCP specimens but reverts to natural warm, soft state in isolation
•Genetically programmed to bond with Wo specimen. Once bonded, testosterone causes isolation to have magnetic effect. Specimen often attempts to break bond again or at least lets other MCP specimens know that he could if he wanted to.
•Eyes vitrify and brain viscosity increases when exposed to Wo specimen’s attempts to eradicate less desirable MCP characteristics.
Common Uses:
•Labour saving devices for taking out the rubbish, mowing the lawn etc
•Desirable heating properties on cold winter nights
•Useful sacrifice in the event of external attack on Wo
Tests:
•Formation of average specimen only completed after contact with Wo.
•Volatile – turns red and explodes when subject to pressure and unable to progress on predetermined path.
•Uncontrolled gravitation towards heat, e.g. BBQs, 98% of the duvet etc.
•Easily absorbed by disproportionately large female mammary glands.
Hazards:
•Greater size in comparison to Wo makes specimen liable to claim unduly high proportion of physical environment, e.g. bed, sofa etc.
•Reproduces uncontrollably by attempting to fuse with Wo at any given opportunity
